It is sad, really……….


Since the “Friday Five” this morning, something has been on my mind. Question # 4 asks if you have ever received an engraved gift? My answer- A Xmas ornament from my sister, engraved with the year we found each other.
The story goes; in 1997 at age 25 I found out I had a bio-dad. I got myself a job where I did skip tracing, worked that job two weeks, just long enough to find him. I contacted his mother first-she was not surprised. I later found that I have two sisters and a brother. Christy is 28 now, Samantha is 26 {I think} and Robbie is 7 days older than me {yep-you heard me right! 7 days} my dad the ho!
I never got along with Samantha; she is an Escort, has children of many fathers and lives off our taxes. I only met Robbie for 5 minutes at the airport, but Christy and I hit it off very well. So well in fact, I gave up my comfy residence in Columbia, MO to move in with her in Jax, FL. I lived with her for 5 months and had to get my own place. Two women, two men and {at the time} six kids in a three bedroom home was a little nuts!
We kept in touch pretty much but our relations started to fall apart when I moved. We didn’t talk as much and we didn’t spend as much time together. I finally picked up and moved back to MO. I hated to leave her but many reasons drove me home, my health being number one!
I have been home now since 2001. Christy and I have spoken to each other maybe 8 times. That includes phone and Internet.
Christy has five boys. Chris is the same age as Brittany, John is 10, TJ is her step son and the same age as John, Alex is 5 he was born on my birthday {I was there for the birth}, and Brandon who is two and sick. I don’t know what all is wrong with Brandon or how serious it is because we were not talking. I didn’t even know she was pregnant again for a long time.

So what is sad is, I think I miss her. Yeah….. I think….. I do sometimes and then I remember the way she ended our relationship, the way she treated me, liked I owed her something-like my life! I really miss the boys. I miss seeing them grow, I miss being in their lives. I want them to know that I exist. Will they remember me?

I spent some time tonight looking her up. Here is the most recent picture of the boys.
From lft to rght….Chris, TJ, John, Brandon and Alex. They have gotten so big! I really do have to say that she has done an awesome job!
I also found a way that I can keep track of her even if she doesn’t want to talk to me. I found an “eboards4all” list she belongs to. I know this is spying and really not like me at all but tonight it seems to be the thing to do. She talks a lot about Brandon on this board, at least I can keep track of the boys this way.

So am I a sad, pathetic excuse for human life tonight or what??