~Sniff, Snort...~


I have the damn FLU. This sucks! I never knew my body could produce this much SNOT!
I NEED ONE OF THESE Little INVENTIONS!

At least I got the Birthday Weekend out of the way. Brittany had her friends show up Saturday at 3ish, girls and boys. We had Pizza, chips, pop corn, koolaide, cake, ice cream and lil' wieners in BBQ sauce. We watched 4 + movies, all the "scary" ones we could find, including "Freddy Vs Jason". The boys where all gone home by 10pm and the girls spent the night and all were gone by 3 pm Suday.
I had one girl puke all over my bathroom and NOT clean it up, instead she left it as a surprise for me. She called her dad secretly not even telling me she felt ill. I hope it was just that she ate too much and not this flu.

Britt got some really cool gifts, expensive ones too. Like Sharon and L got her SIMS Superstar-WOW! My mom got her the LOTR return of the king W/ castle...LOTS of artist stuff, paper, pencils....
yeah, she raked it in! I really wish she would Blog about it all. Maybe I can talk her into it.

Ok time to go blow my brains out and DE-Germ my home.

Happy Birthday Baby~

My baby girl is a TEENAGER today, yup-THIRTEEN!
We are having a HUGE coed-party starting at 3pm and a sleepover for all the girls tonight.
I have a lot to get done here, I will cry later. I always cry on their birthdays, a happy cry, for how wonderful they are.

If you want to send her a Happy Birthday Ecard, her email is Bloom_fan_nmbr1@yahoo.com
I can not believe - THIRTEEN!

~I had a Visitor~

Yesterday was so wonderful! The ONLY thing that could have made it any better was if I had more energy!

My Girl, my girlfriend...Well okay... ex-girlfriend I guess, came for a visit and brought with her the most precious of baby boys! Her son is two years old and ALL boy, he just did not stop while he was here! He loves trucks and playing the drums ~on anything~, running up & down the hall chasing cats and he has the most WONDERFUL laugh! The kind of laugh that would make the most angry person, smile.

OHHHH SMILE, Beautiful and bright, straight from his momma's genes. Amanda has always been very beautiful to me. I remember when I first laid eyes on her at my daughters soccer game. I remember the first time we touched, the first time we kissed, the first time we.....
Well, you get what I mean. Seeing her brought all this back.
Her touch is so soft, SHE is so soft. We cuddled on the couch watching TV and as she ran her fingers though my hair, the great memories came rushing back and I realized how very much I miss her!

We brought up a couple of the great times and a few of the horrid ~John~ times we spent together. Laughed at the mistakes we made and are grateful for the lessons we learned. We were very good together! It is was so hard to see her leave this morning, knowing that her and her little man live four hours away.

Those that remember when Amanda and I were together, living together, also remember the great painful fight we had when we split. Her step-mom remembered, funny thing though, neither one of us really remember what the fight/split-up was really about. We do not need to remember, with feeling like we had/HAVE for each other any negativity we ever had between us was always quickly diminished and we have always held on to the love, no matter how far apart we are. ~Says Amanda: "We let it Pass Like Gas!"~
I guess you can say, the relationship I have with her has always been much better than any I have ever had with any MAN.

~Numa Numa~

How did I miss this?

It REALLY is a feel good song and dance, especially when some of us are starting a

3-day weekend.

~sorry Nan Luv You!!~

Anyway, the web page is really busy but look to the right, about half way down and find "WATCH THIS MOVIE".

This guy has been all over the net and the news now.

ENJOY

~Proud Momma~

Last night was another award ceremony at the school for Samantha. She is the School Council Member for her class and received a "Letter of Recognition" last night!

I am so very proud at how hard my babies work at school and how very well they all do!

~Whose Dreams Have I?~

Three nights in a roll I have had baby dreams, single ME, the one that has had a total hysterectomy in 1995, baby dreams? Follow me here and if you have a “Dream Book” please grab it.
Night #1
Yay I am pregnant with triplets! In the hospital they lost the third heartbeat and prepared for an emergency cesarean. Turns out that I woke up with two of my three babies, they were no bigger than the palm of my hand. Get this, the nurses had them dressed, wrapped and placed in a basket that fit snuggly in each palm. They were so tiny! I was screaming for my other baby {hello-TRIPLETS?!} but it was like I was screaming into a void.

Night #2
Friends and I went out on the town; I took the babies with us being as tiny as they were in the hospital. We ended up in a tunnel and somehow I lost them.
After a frantic 2 days of searching, the babies were both found. It was said that they were not breathing. I took them, ran my finger on their bottom lips {ya know, like breast-feeding mom’s do to see if the baby is hungry} and I attached one to each nipple. Even though my milk was dry {from 2 days of stress, I guess} the babies suckling produced enough milk to make them vibrant once again, however tiny.

Night #3
I am at home; at least I think it is my home, with friends. I am arguing with them all about being pregnant. See, out of dream-state, I am physically not able to get pregnant, just not possible. I took about 50 pregnancy tests to prove I was pregnant. I would pee on the stick and get an instant “you are pregnant” line. I was angry that no one would believe me until I had to prove it to them.

Okay, so WTF?
The only one I know that is pregnant, is no longer speaking to me and I am just not sure that anyone else in my circle is actually able to have children.
What does it all mean? If you can, plz help. Thankx

~I See Dead People~

Okay, not dead but nearly dead. I have a tendency not to believe in my abilities until the third time something happens. To make a long story short, I can see AIDS, full blown, AIDS. Now I can see Auras and I have a friend that sees cancer, so this is not anything new to me at all. Just something I realized today when Britt and I were in the hospital waiting room {waiting for an X-ray of her foot}. There where two people there who had it and it made me sad. Nuff said.

Today's Horoscope Quickie for me.........

"Why waste time with people who don't treat you well? Make some new friends."

Well now, there is something to think about, aye?
After trying to be caring to women {coughW-loKittycough} then being "grouped" into the people that treat them badly.

Oh whine.

The worse thing I have done to a "friend" is ask for some time to myself.
Some people just make me sick.

~The Single Life~

The serenity of quite nights at home.
No headaches from nagging...{YES, men nag also!}
Freedom to express myself in my own way.
To raise my children the way I want them raised.
To sit in a house that is just a mess with NO guilt!

and then....

Out to meet the masses.....Maybe even get lucky....
Then the realization hits me like a brick wall....
gettin' laid = emotions....this Chica ain't headed that way just yet. I am not through having fun with myself.

There are 2 gentlemen I have wanted to sink my claws into {fellow TDers} that I realized something about last night. I could be the best of friends with them both! ONE of them I LOVE to hug, would be my cuddle bunny, could hug on that man all day and the other is just sweet and one hell of a lot of fun. Laughter is great for any relationship...eerm ...Friendship.

Isn't it a great thing to know, you CAN be friends, even somewhat physical friends, with the opposite sex and have absolutely no strings attached.
I am sure when I am ready to have strings, I will have my pick and not settle like I always have before.
I have learned so much about me in a years time and it feels great.

My love for WOMEN?

YES, I love them, love looking at them, watching them move, kissing them. Women are VERY complex creatures, emotions run VERY high. Even though I have completely amicable friendships with past male companions, I am not so lucky with past female companions.
However, I do have a woman in my grasp, a dominant one even. I think she is very beautiful in every way and she finds me quite the treat {I hope anyway}, but like I said, complex.... Married to an asshole. I want to be able to take her away from it ALL! Can I give her everything she needs? Humm, I just don't think so, not yet anyway! ~wink~

So I suppose that be it fer my psychobabble, I need to get busy cleaning.

Awww...self-realization is a wonderful thing, aye?

I know, been a day or so since I posted. It is 4:30 AM and I haven't been home too long from the bar. I had a GREAT time with TRIXIE DELIGHT as always and with my girls.

If you are reading this and you don't know, Trixie Delight has a yahoo group for their fans. Just let me know who you are and I will send you the link!

For the rest of ya's.....I am going to bed, they wore me out tonight, I am too pooped to pop....or would that be too buzzed to blog? Even though I didn't drink...
See how tired I am......NiNi

~snnnnooowwwwww~

That is my snow chant, taught to us by Brittany's 5th grade teacher. We {the teachers at school} are praying that school is closed tomorrow. The kids where just little monsters today! Even the normally good ones had horns growing.
So come on, chant with us........Ssssnnnnooowwwwwwww!

My day really was not at all involved until I got a call from S about a possible business proposition! The more I think about it, the more excited I get. Thank you so very much for thinking of me! {{Huggz}}
A new store is opening and he wants dresses, patchwork dresses. The store will be opening on the 20th, I have plenty of fabric to start with and then I can talk to him, see if he likes my work and update on that later.

As for now, I am outta here.
Leave a comment and tell me if you like the pictures on the left, the change each page load. Also, let me know if the hearts get in the way or if the page takes too long to load.

kisszzzzz
NiNi sweet dreams and all that jazz......snnnnoooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Rainy days go by fast when I'm bein' a slacker!

I went to work today at the school

{{3 hours with elementary children}}

and the rest of the time I have been here surfing the internet.

My two girls are in the schools big-play-o-the-year, "The Wizard Of OZ" and I am obsessing over costumes. See, I usually do make my children's costumes myself, one of the perks of being a SAHM, but this year I volunteered to help with ALL the costumes.

~as those who know me well roll their eyes~

I surfed the web for munchkin and OZian costumes and found

NO flowers on hats, NO poof in the dresses

and NOT enough green in OZ!!

Manna is a munchkin and her costume is half done and POOFY-like the movie munchkins, ya know?! Britt is an OZian and we have her HALF green already.
I really want this to be a good play for everyone. There IS a lot of help and I know it will not ever be exactly like the original movie.

~sigh~

I just need a valuim or sex or ........

YEAH....SEX will do the trick!

TTFN

~NFL HISTORY MADE TONIGHT~

Lil' Wieners and chips for game, $20.00. Pepsi for kids and coffee for me, $8:00, watching the Super Bowl with my 10 y/o son, PRICELESS!

~HISTORY~
Tonights Super Bowl was the FIRST time a Super Bowl game had been tied in the third quarter!

Watching the game was just completely invigurating in everyway!
Watching Tom Brady play just makes me glow. That man can fill out a football uniform so VERY well! He is just SWEET from head to toe!
My 13 y/o daughter thinks that Bruschi has a great smile and eyes! She has GREAT taste, just like her mom!

The PREgame show was fantastic. It included Gretchen Wilson, Black Eyed Peas, John Fogerty and Charlie Daniels. When Charlie Daniels played that violin, I got chills all over! He is marvelous! Alicia Keys had children on stage with her who where blind and/or deaf to sing and sign to America the Beautiful in honor of Ray Charles.

The National Anthem included combined choirs of the U.S. Naval Academy, U.S. Air Force Academy, U.S. Military Academy at West Point, U.S. Coast Guard Academy and U.S. Army Herald Trumpets and survivors of WW11.
I FELT SO PROUD!

The half time show was GREAT also. Paul McCartney sang four of his best songs, including my fave ~Hey Jude~ !
~More useless NFL info; the Beatles rocked out at the GATOR BOWL 40 years ago!

The ads, can’t forget about the ADS! They were good this year, better than I imagined actually. I got a few faves;
#1 the 2005 MUSTANG
#2 Olympus Dance
P.Diddy’s Diet Pepsi and the monkey’s both ran a close third.

YOU can actually WATCH them all and then vote for your fave HERE

Even if you do not like football ~*~snarl~*~ you WOULD have loved this show!

Last but not least for those who know my bets and me. I came out perfectly matching the final score again tonight!
I know, I know, I SHOULD play Fantasy Football and I am still thinking about it!
That would make only one game I missed the score on this whole NFL season, and 3 points missed that game. ~sigh~

Okay, bedtime for me, I am winding down a bit now I believe. Gonna have sweet dreams and my wish for sweet dreams to all of you!

~Clears Throat~

I am back online and I do not plan on going off line again at all - EVER.
Geez, the withdraws are nerve-racking.

So.....What has been going on with me for the past month or so? Not sure where to start. ~Sigh~
Ok, I made it though Xmas only because we had a family adopt my kids and my parents bought them quite a bit, otherwise they would have not received anything at all. Oh YEAH and someone else got them something , but I will add that later.

I turned 34, was in severe pain, started self mutilation which relieved the pain. Kinda like having someone stomp on my foot so I do not feel the pain in my arm. Anyway, I began to understand the reason why teenagers "cut".
Before you ask, NO I am not a cutter, I probably would be-or worse- if it hadn't been for my doctors. No one cared to even understand what I was going though except them and then that was only when I could barely even walk into the office.
So, for my New Years gift I was given 12 medications to choke down everyday. With 2 NEW diagnose'.

I was also given the pain of loss. A gift for being honest with a person whom I believed understood and loved me. I was in so much physical, emotional and spiritual pain I asked to be given some time apart from her. In return, she took away 20 years of our lives and smeared my name. ~sigh~ Nothing last forever.
She is the other "santa" to the children this year. I thank her for the charity. I was so determined to return these gifts from her, for I know that is what she would have done, but I know she loves these children and they love her. I am not that heartless.

My phone and internet had been turned off due to non-payment, my electric too. They tried to cut the gas but they are not allowed to turn that off until March.
Blood from a turnip is just not possible. I get SSI- 683$/mnth....RENT = $600...shall I say more? I REFUSE to do the same ol' thing in getting a man to fall in lust and move in with me, I would rather suffer, thank you.

I have begun the fight of getting the Child Support owed to me, but history tells me that his deadbeat ass will be thrown in jail before he sends me a dime.

I have also started the divorce, which will also be a fight cuz I am going to ask for alimony.

I have never been a bitch like this, pushing people for what is RIGHTLY owed to me, but I am old, I am sick and I am tired. I have 3 children- 2 pre-teens, one teenager. They need to be taken care of, this is rightly owed to THEM as well!

Not like I haven't been doing my part here. Actually I should be dead or at least completely bed-ridden. Instead I have been working from home, have an industrial sewing machine that a dear friend "fronted me". I have been sewing, but the company I now sew for does not seem to be working out.

I miss my girls so much- the girls I go out with. The band, the laughter, the fun. It has made me feel lonely to not be able to get outta here. ~blah~

So now that you have read though the sad shit- wanna hear how it is picking up?

Well, February is looking up as the people who love me are here with me helping when they can. My dad has....

taken care of my phone so that the kids have one.
My landowner {whom everyone things is a bastard} has just bought me a new Frigidaire refrigerator, gave me cable TV with ALL the movie channels {a feed off his box, legally since this is a commercial building} and FREE cable internet.

My mom, Goddess bless her soul, is on Full-Flu alert, and has bought the over-the-counter meds the kids need to beat this crap that is going around. So far Manna is the only one who has caught it and instead of her fever going down, it has been going UP.
Mom also keeps me in the necessities such as TP, snack foods, gas for the car and CIGS!
No matter how mad I get at her, she is the glue that holds me here!
I have thought over the past week that the kids are now old enough to not need me and I can go.... but here I stay because of that glue. No matter how old you get, you always need your mom I guess.

So-There is an update for ya, hope it wasn't too boring or depressing. I will update again soon- like tomorrow ~wink~