Talked to MadMan tonight. He doesn’t sound good at all, I can tell that he has majorly upped his dose of Ephedrine he is taking by the way he was taking in breathes of air and tone of voice. He still doesn’t “get” how I know these things, but when you are with someone for 7 years, you know, you JUST know.
He has called quite a bit since he has been gone and I haven’t felt like I could talk to him. I just haven’t been comfortable enough to hear him. When he called tonight, I knew he had to be heard, so I stayed on the phone. I have no idea why I put myself through it, why after what he put me through do I even care anymore? He still and most likely will never see what he has done to me. I don’t think it is because he doesn’t “care” because I know he does, I think it is because he is sick. He needs help and I cannot do that for him.
He had many questions tonight- mostly about Chad. Like, where is Chad? Where does he live now? Why don’t you have him move in with you? Then he moved on to my other friends like “S”…..what does “S” think of me? Is she in the middle of the Chad drama with you? {what the hell is that anyway??}
Of course there was more…..those of you who know MadMan know there was more……
I told him the “short” answers to his questions, I have never lied to him and I do not plan on starting now, even though he keeps trying to catch me in a lie.
I suppose it is like a cheater…when one spouse cheats they always blame the other spouse to take the focus off themselves?? I know HE is a liar, I have caught him many, many times….so he keeps trying to catch me in a lie to take to the focus off of him…..well, keep trying, I don’t lie! Life is too short to lie to anyone.
So then, after not being about to catch me in a lie, he proceeds to tell me that he has a GIRLFRIEND and it is NOT Rachel! WHAT? NOT Rachel?? Poor girl, and she wanted him soooo bad!
So MadMan can’t get to me anymore, I won’t allow it and it pisses him off to no end.
I don’t think it funny, really, I think that he really needs to wake up and see what the hell he is doing to himself, his life! I really wish I had a recorder on that phone, I think I will have one for the next call, just so I can play it back for him when/IF he gets well.