~SIGH~

Another day, another $300.00 {{goddess willing}}! It is Thursday, one of my busiest days but here at 11:30pm it is very slow. I am in for a long one it looks like. I am up for it though, I got rest, kitchen is CLEAN, kids are fed, cleaned and put away-all is good in the world.

Sitting here night after night, typing, talking on the phone and feeding my face is not good for my body. I hurt, mainly aches and pains, I have spiked fevers for no reason, mom thinks I have arthritis in my hip. So as my body tries to turn on me, I turn on it. I walked tonight, after I fed the kids. We went to Frances Park and walked for half an hour. I could have done more but I sure do not want to push it.
It felt GREAT and I know I need to keep it up everyday!

I am slowly realizing that my search for Mr. Good Dom needs to get restarted. J is away on business, which is fine with me, ideal actually because it gives me time to work on me. Since He has left, I have received no calls, emails or IMs.....Here is my sign {{sigh}} but at least J did come into my life and He did show me that my flame still burns. I am in no hurry what-so-ever, I know better than most that you can NOT rush these things or just settle. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt!!

So anyway, my comments still have not reset...My readers do not like to scroll....It is now going on 2am....I need another call and I'm gonna tinker more with this template! Also gotta check to see if CHAPTER 25 is posted over at BDSM Forum.

~*~ SURPRISE~*~

Well, that was a shocker, wasn't it? Quite the change from the other blog layout. I embrace change and it was just time. I like this layout because I can show you all pictures, changing them as often as I'd like.

Unfortunately in changing the blog, I lost the comments you all left. Only lost them for 24 hours {{I hope}}. They are still on my Haloscan page so if they do not repost themselves, I will repost them.

So, I need input! Give me your opinion! Do you like this blog better?? What is/is not working?? What can I change??

~FUN~
We had a great time taking Pictures for you all! Here are the one that have been asked for so far. PLEASE keep asking cuz I am having a great time!

Chasmyn and Martha wanted my computer desk.
Chasmyn also wants to see my fave pair of shoes on and one of my collections.

N wants to see TITO [1][2][3][4], my clean kitchen [1] [2] {{thank goodness it is still clean}} and my bath salts and oils.

Sharon wants to see my scar {giggle} here and here, if you really wanna be morbid you can look here...... a project I am currently working on and my fave outfit.

This is FUN! I wanna do MORE!

~~FUN FUN FUN~~
Great MEME I got from Chasmyn, who got it from Pesky Apostrophe who got it from SwirlSpace who got it from TwoDolla.....
Go see them too, AFTER you leave your COMMENT on mine!

Think of 3 pictures you'd like to see. Leave whatever you'd like to see in the comments. Things around my house, or whatever... something I can take a picture of easily. Once I have enough requests, I'll start posting them. If I can't, or won't, take a picture of something you've requested, I'll let you know.

So- TELL ME, What do YOU wanna see???

~*~I MISSED ME~*~

Now this be the way to start a Monday!
Litter boxes: CLEAN
Dishes: washed and put away- not 1 dirty one in the sink....
Kitchen floor: swept and mopped!

Laundry: caught up!
and it isn't even 6:30 AM.......

OHHH I love and MISSED this side of ME!

Name THREE of your........

1. Pet Peeves: Ice Chomping, Hanging-droopy pants, pussified men
2. Favorite Sounds: My children, L&A Chime, Coffee brewing
3. Desk Items: Publisher, Adobe, Trillian
4. Biggest Fears: something happening to my children, drowning, finances
5. Biggest Challenges: Raising 3 kids alone, my health, relationships
6. Newest 'Toys': 5-in-1 drill, Oreck Vac, TENS Unit
7. Most Used Words: NO!, I Love You, Stop That!
8. Most Mispelled Words: probably, psychic, Supercalafragalisticexpiealadotious
9. Favorite Disney Characters: Pooh, Alice In Wonderland, Finding Nemos Dory
10. Bookmarks on Your Homepage: Carbon Dioxide Extraction ,
E-WITCH Auction Astrology Zone

After being awake for going on 24 hours,

drooling over BLOGGIDY GOODNESS and eating a McGriddle

I MUST BLOG AGAIN!
{{{ohhh, will it EVER end???}}

WELLLLL- Let me address that question first as I was looking at my postings lately. If you are my regular reader, you know how I am. If you are not, it goes like this; YES it WILL end, or at least go on HIATUS as I tend to blog in WAVES. Like most things in my life, it will be good for awhile then.......poof.......Then low and behold after much pleading from my one reader, I am back again!

Now that being said, I must say this:

LIFE IS GRAND WHEN YOU HAVE PSYCHIC'S WATCHING YOUR BACK! Psychic's....NOT psychos

{goddess knows I have enough of them in my life too!}
The other day it was told that my 2 bestest friends where gossiping about me, which they often do as I am everybodies favorate subject these days. When these two gossip about me tho, it is always done in LOVE even if there is a tiff amoung us.
The gossip was about my new Dom.....no one has met Him, i certainly do not know enough about Him.....blah blah...One of the friends even went as far as to say, if I needed her to take my kids for any reason {being hurt or whatever} she would.

YIKES.....so they are WORRIED! RED LIGHT......
ok? ok! Sooooo,
After I worked last night, I signed on MY screen name and went into chats.....of course they were BDSM related chats.....Met a DOM....He IMd me.....we chatted.....
to make a long story short.....THANK THE GODS I MET J B4 I MET THIS GUY!!!!!!

This be the one they were worried about, I am sure!!

Some of the things that he wants to do are listed in the partial IM below.... read on- it gets BETTER... whhhhhoooooohahahhahahhahahhahhahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

~I SPOKE TO SATAN~
WARNING:Extremely Graphic Wording:WARNING
WARNING:Read with CAUTION:WARNING


(4:25:27 AM): I warn you, I am extreme, strict, and demanding, but evry loving ot the one that lives to please Me,
(4:25:33 AM): and a bit of a sadist
4:26:39 AM): familiar with corset and waist training?
(4:27:05 AM): yes Sir..
(4:27:30 AM): well, I require 23/7 corset wear to eventually produce a wasp like waist
(4:27:52 AM): I find that body modification and control have a profound effect on the mind
(4:28:13 AM): very much into the mental conditioning of body modifications
(4:29:58 AM): have even researched floating rib removal to further and more easily alter the waist
(4:33:42 AM): oh, I even fantasize of having a slave's clit completely removed
(4:34:05 AM): wondering if this Sir is American?
(4:34:15 AM): lol I am indeed
(4:34:41 AM): the removal of the female clit-hood is practiced to this day in the Arabic communities
(4:34:48 AM): this would truly alter the state of mind
(4:35:00 AM): yes I know
(4:35:21 AM): but I speak of the entire clit being removed and scraped to the bone
(4:36:09 AM): she will concentrate on pleasing her Master once her main source of sexual pleasure is gone forever
(4:38:17 AM): I would never consider such a thing unless I wanted that slave for life
(4:41:58 AM): oh, "it" should also know that I have a serious high heel fetish and require My lady to eventually learn to wear 5 to 7 inch stilettos almost 24/7
(4:42:27 AM): so much so that it eventually becomes painfull if not physically impossible to wear flats or go barefoot
(4:42:41 AM): this is also extremely important to Me
(5:14:03 AM): I have also fantasized about a mock hanging
(5:14:48 AM): for breath control only?
(5:15:06 AM): well, breath control I do use often
(5:15:14 AM): oxygen deprivation
(5:15:25 AM): but, it is a real hanging I wish
(5:16:09 AM): the trust, fear, and power excite Me
(5:17:59 AM): any needle torture experience?
lady_persephone1227 (5:18:01): no Sir, i have not
(5:19:07 AM): I see
(5:19:13 AM): I use this often
(5:19:33 AM): I have even sewn the cunt lips shut for an extended period
(5:19:48 AM): sewn the nipples tightly together for a day
(5:20:11 AM): breast torture with many many needles
(5:20:41 AM): I even twice nailed a pets cunt lips to a table top and made her stand there for an hour

(5:21:21 AM): just being honest with My needs
(5:21:38 AM): as I said, I am a sadist
5:23:48 AM): I also enjoy temporary breast enlargement with multiple saline solution injections
(5:24:09 AM): also very painfull, but rewarding lol
(5:35:46 AM): "it" would exist solely for My pleasure and entertainment
(5:36:09 AM): no right to any decisions, period
(5:36:47 AM): Sir, may this girl be excused for the day?
(5:37:31 AM): sadly, it may
(5:37:41 AM): and I shall see the girl tonight

Now, Tell me, honestly, as you read that, did you hear a little voice in your head whisper....
"IT PUTS THE LOTION ON IT'S SKIN OR IT GETS THE HOSE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!"

I AM MASOCHISTIC, but COME ON!! I am now officially FREAKED OUT!!
This girl needs a LOVING DOM....SPANK You very much!!!!

Oh My Goddess!!
i just spend a couple HOURS on this blog! This is simply THE BEST THING i have read since "The Story of O"!
i could not move away from it, i cried with Danielle, giggled with her and Bill, sat with my hand covering my mouth through MOST.....i am in AWWWWWW
Oh yeah- THIS is
BLOGGIDY GOODNESS
******{{kicks you}} what are you waiting for??
Go read BDSM Forum-------> http://bdsmforum.blogspot.com/

~Things I do when
I am SUPPOSE to be Grocery Shopping~

1: Took the kids to PetsMart = 1 1/2 hours {{eye roll}}
2: Went to Diary Queen and had MR Misty Floats.....Remember those?? ummmmm
3: Went to Frances Park to SWING!! WOOT!! I can swing Higher than you can!! And I can twist and go round and round really fast!

I think they had a GREAT time with their 12 year old mom. I even let them start the car...
yes I have lost my mind!
Now, I feel my age........but OH it was so worth it!
Time for a nap!

Oh and I never did make it to the grocery store.....sigh.....

The SATURDAY SIX {tried to include his button-didn't work}
1. Who is the last person you took a photograph of?

2. What decade do you hold the most dear and why?

3. Take the quiz: What mystical creature are you?

4. What is your favorite alcoholic beverage?

5. What do you normally wear to bed?

6. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #24 from Cherie: What movie character do you most identify with?



MY ANSWERS:

1: My daughter with her new kitten.

2: The 80's, so many memories, great music, so many lessons learned.

3: You're like a fairy. Fairies were the little pixies that usually lived in the forest with wings like butterflies and perfect little faces. they had brown or blonde hair and pale skin with freckles. They were entergetic, joyful, playful, very smart, and peaceful. Fairies are deffinately the most famous of all fantasy creatures.

4: Amaretto Sours with a double shot of Amaretto.

5: AN oversized tshirt.

6: Jami Gertz {film name-"Star" in The Lost Boys-BEST movie of all time!}

In case you missed it, I have a new Dom in my life. I have not made the decision to give of myself to Him nor vise versa, Wwe are just starting, so much to learn! We met awhile ago online and met face to face the day I wrote this post .
What I know of Him is that He is truly phenomenal as a Man, a Dominant, as a human. He has the sight that I have been looking for in a Dom as I have trouble seeing myself at times. He is gentle, and is a complete gentleman!
He is now more than a 22 hour drive away from me and I am missing the opportunity to get to talk to Him. I am not even sure if He made it to His destination safely. Wwe had a talk about my lack of patience {giggle} and how I need to work on that, this is quite the start!
I am, however, keeping myself busy and my thoughts on Him as I work on the list of chores He made me before leaving. Just simple things like dishes and laundry.....and, finishing the projects I started months ago......
My kitchen is CLEAN and my laundry is caught up!! It has been sooooo long!
I am very glad to have met Him, I can not wait until I speak to Him again.

~*~ I am LOVED ~*~

I am one of FEW friends and I keep it that way for a few reasons. The friends I have, I have had for MANY years {{20 + years}}. Together we have built trust, {Trust is something EARNED- not FREELY given, like some would think}, we have gone through heart breaks together, true loves, all of the changes life has thrown us.
I will always be there for them and I know they will always be here for me.
Goddess knows I stress them! May the gods bless their hearts! Once again they are concerned for my well being. {Will this ever end?? I am afraid NOT for I am a free-spirited Saggy!}
At this time in our lives we do not have the benefit of living close like before, so I will try my best to update here of what is going on in my head - we all know how eclectic my mind can be, how fast I can change positions, opinions, loves. I truly hope this helps.
I LOVE you guys!! Thank you so much for having my back! {{{{{muah}}}}}

~WTF?~

I woke up this morning in horrible pain! Head pain….couldn’t even call it a headache, really, it just hurt really bad.
I noticed that I felt rather weird, eyes burned, skin burned…..so I took my temp……103.5
Where the hell did THAT come from??? I was fine yesterday?!?! Well- that would be the reason for the head pain, the titanium in the back of my head was too heated and was burning me! So I made some OJ, took some medicine, put my blanket and pillows on the couch and crashed.
I slept most of the day. The only time I woke was because the fever spiked again or to go to the bathroom.
Each time as I drifted back to sleep, I grunted to myself about how I am never going to get my list done this way.
Which reminds me, once I feel a little better, I feel the need to update my readers about this “list”, Who gave it to me and why. Stay tooned!

UPDATE: fed the kids, did dishes, did homework, watched a movie with them, put them to bed, worked for a couple hours, now I am off to bed.
Feeling MUCH better…..fever and pain are just about gone.

~*~ i was seen today ~*~

someone down in the deep, dark depths of my soul FEELS today.

someone i felt was never to be found.

someone whom only i have seen, now is seen by Another.

she is frightened, only ever knowing her own touch,
now she yearns to trust the touch of another.

her mind swims with emotions.
The words He has said dance like Fire Sprites on flame.
she has no more questions to ask of Him-
Looking at Him, she finds all her answers.


He sees her from the inside out.
He hears her, even though she doesn’t speak.
He holds her in His palm
Gently, softly
His tender touch gingerly coaxing
her out of the still darkness that is her shell.

When He first tested her reaction to His touch
She did not flinch
She only melted into Him;
Mind, Body and Soul.

Thank You Sir for waking me up inside.

I know I have been quite, but another chapter in my life has now finally come to a close.
I had a seperation from my marrage {{divorce pending}}, loss of the marital properties, rebound relationship and lost friendships all over the past year.
I have been feeling the emotions, finally and the depression that comes with.
I have been here before. This too shall pass and it is. It is passing faster with each given day and TODAY I got a light at the end of my tunnel!
I will fill you in on that light once I get the emotions in check.

***QUIZ #2***

LMAO You gotta go see this one!! It's FUN!
Here are my results...........

Your score as a human being is 74.05.

Middle of the road, eh? Does that mean you're yellow? Yellow as a salamander frying on blacktop? Yellow as a urinal cake? Yellow as a delicious marshmallow Peep? Mmmm. Peep. Sometimes I think if it weren't for Just Born candy, I would just expel my life force and expire. Hot Tamales. Mike and Ikes.
But I digress.
Nicely done.
You are robustly average, and I approve of it.

***POP QUIZ***
TY to Jenny Turpish

eXpressive: 6/10
Practical: 9/10
Physical: 3/10
Giver: 8/10

You are a XPIG--Expressive Practical Intellectual Giver.

This makes you a Catch.You are a magazine-cover, matinee idol dreamboat. Parents love you and want to set you up with their kids. However, first dates are tough because it takes time for your qualities to come out. You are generous and kind. You think first and act later. You are cool in a conflict, but your practical side means if your partner throws out emotional appeals ("why can't we do what I want for a change?") they will grate on your nerves, even when the conflict is resolved. You're a romantic. You enjoy the thrill of the hunt, and you don't just fall into bed with anyone. You pay close attention to your significant other's needs, and this makes you an excellent lover and partner. The problem is that your friends and lovers may find it so easy to express things to *you* that they lose sight of whether you feel as comfortable with *them*! This doesn't necessarily make you feel under-appreciated -- you're too well-adjusted and self-aware for that -- but you may feel restless. Thus you seek adventure in your life outside the relationship to prove and actualize yourself.

Of all the types, you would make the best parent.

You are coiffed.

Didja see "Big Fish"? 'Cause you're like Ewan MacGregor in "Big Fish."

Of the 59051 people who have taken this quiz, 8.4 % are this type.

***I AM IN AWE! PERFECTLY ME!***

*~*BLESSED*~*

I am totally blessed. Not sure what it is I have done to be so deserving.......

I have the WORLDS greatest children!! I have yet to meet ANY child that does what all 3 of mine do for me!

I work all night, my babies {ages 12, 10 and 10} ago to bed at 9PM. I start work at 9ish and finish work at around 5:30AM. After I get them to school, clean, fed, groomed, I sleep.....until 2....About 5 hours IF I'm lucky!
Today I picked them up from school, we took to car to clean it, went to the store and by the time I got home my head was gonna explode.
***RANT***
****The pain was mainly because today I only got a good 2 1/2 hours of good sleep before my PHONE RANG {{urrrrggg}} Of course I didn't answer because it was someone I told not to call during the day but it woke me anyway. I have the phone by my bed in case the school calls.****

About 5:30 my sweet babies came to me and said, "Mom, we can just grab something to eat for dinner. Don't worry about cooking tonight." Then they went to the kitchen and fed themselves.
Around 7ish, my youngest daughter hopped on the bed with me and said, " mom, take a nap, we will wake you when it is time for us to go to bed." Then she started to play with my hair. My babies fingers in my hair will cure a headache anyday!
Next thing I know, all three of them are on my bed, "MOM! We are gonna go to bed!! Mom!!" I glance at the clock...it is 8PM....NOT only did they NOT take advantage of me.....They remembered to go to bed an hour early {punishment from the night before}.
WOW! Angels! They just totally GLOW! I am SO PROUD! They take such good care of their momma!
I kissed them all over....Hugs forever, didn't want to let them go! I just could not tell them enough how very, very much I appreciate them all and how wonderful they are!

~*~WHOOO Thank Goddess THAT'S over~*~

Have you ever wanted to avoid someone so much that EVERYBODY you ran into looked just like the person you wanted to avoid??
HEH

Right now everyone in this city looks like personnel from the 125th Fighter Wing .

Other than being paranoid, I have worried and worked on Hurricane Frances. Wiccans are wonderfully strong beings when it comes to destruction/mayheim beyond our control.
Over the past couple days, I have met and chatted with {later finding out} Wiccans and neither of us knowing why or how we found each other. My very dearest friend {in Hurricane Frances' Path} has also had this happen to her. Everyone I know, Everyone I have talked too that studies, believes in or is affiliated in any way to an Earth Based Religion, has come together in some way shape or form in every natural disaster I can remember.
This is one of the biggest PULLS though. I get- We all think...."Please, ENOUGH death, SOOO SOON, We just can't let it happen!" OF COURSE- Mother Nature will win out- it is her destruction in the end....All we can do right now is be spoiled children and push her until she weakens! SO, GO DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO AND HELP ME OUT HERE!

UPDATE

Frances has gone from a Cat 4 to a cat 5 {FOR ALL OF 30 MINUTES}and now has dropped to a cat 3!! WOOT!!
Frances continues to weaken but remains a powerful Category 3
6:24 A.M. ET Fri.,Sep.3,2004